Adventures in Email (or: don’t check your spam folder)

Posted on 22 February 2013

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So I’m checking my spam folder last night because my breath is all baited with waiting for something and I see there’s one asking me

‘Are there paedophiles in your neighbourhood?’

And I think

‘If I was raising kids in my neighbourhood they wouldn’t be running around the streets of inner city Melbourne without me until they were old enough to know better than to talk to strangers and anyway if they were going to be attacked by a sexual predator that predator would likely be someone I had invited to spend time with us myself so whether or not there are paedophiles in my neighbourhood is pretty moot you stupid fear-mongering spaminator.’

So then because they’ve pissed me off I click on the email because when someone pisses me off I like to engage with them further just make sure they have more chances to piss me off. And the email says

Screen Shot 2013-02-21 at 11.15.28 AM

BUT. Above the image there’s a line of hyperlinked text saying

‘Is your arrest public?’

And I’m like

UGH face

WAY TO HEDGE YOUR BETS YOU EVIL FEAR-MONGERING-ON-BOTH-SIDES-OF-THIS-ISSUE BASTARDS.

Get the hell out of my internet.

.

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Posted in: Dumbass theories